I have been blessed to have been surrounded by many strong men during the years that have helped me grow and become the person I am today. These people include my Father In Law, my Grandfather in Law (just call him Granddad), my son’s Godfather, my favorite uncles, etc. None more important though than the man who gave me birth, my dad. He taught me early, without knowing it, about Servant Leadership – being humble, putting others before you, sacrifice yourself for the benefit of others. I had no worries while I was growing up because my dad carried those burdens for me.
What I have learned over the years is that we as men lack emotion, specifically towards each other. It is easy for us to love our daughters – to hug them, hold them, kiss them good night. It it very easy for me to wipe away my daughter’s tears, give her a big hug, and kiss her good night. But we struggle with that same emotion with our son’s. We teach our sons (because it is what we were taught) to be tough and don’t cry (that’s weak) and don’t kiss another man.
But it is our sons that need this affection from fathers more than daughters. My son is nearly 4 years old and I learned very quickly that he needs affection. I kiss him twice a day – once in the morning before school, once in the evening when he is going to bed. And yes, on the lips. I give him hugs often, sometime he will just come take one from me. We both need this affection because it shows that we are there for each other.
Each man should “Dance with his Father” (to steal the line from Luther Vandross). Show your son that it is still manly to be emotional with his dad.
Happy Fathers Day to all of the Men with their own children, and those who are role models t others.
Kontinue to Konker.
Chadwick Taylor is Author of KONKERER Leadership
He helps develop leaders with a servant mentality through individual development